Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no difference in the world.

“Drought is the best thing that ever happened to my lawn. And my beard.”

“The Bronze Age was such a third-place era.”

“When I’m tired, I say, “I’m calling it a night.” Well, what else am I going to …”

“My facial hair is imperative. I put the must in mustache.”