Why celebrate my birthday? My birthday is the product of two people’s—my parents’—hard work. I can’t celebrate what I didn’t earn. However, anything I achieved after the day I was born, I’m free to celebrate.

“I am upset. I have reservations about dinner for two at 8:00. I have reservatio…”

“It doesn’t matter if I don’t have a suit, you should still invite me swimming. …”

“A brick could be used as a mule. Sure, you could argue it’d be better used as a…”

“Sunday nights I get about two inches of sleep. But I make do, because that’s al…”