She was hearing the words. They just weren't registering on her Richter scale of sanity.
Dakota CassidyTags: humor insanity funny hearing richter-scale
Jesus Christ in a miniskirt.
Dakota CassidyNina chuckled, giving Katie her infamous devilish grin. "It means you aren't just a werecougar, lady. You're a cougar-cougar. You took stereotyping to a whole 'nother level. You're like one of those 'doesn't look her age' chicks who hits on young dudes because they got the zoom in their boom still happening. You're a total label. Hot. Niiiice work, Mrs. Robinson.
Dakota CassidyWhat if it wasn't the guy from the bar? What if it was some freak out looking to whack some chick off because his mommy didn't make him buttered toast and cut it into fun shapes when he was a kid?
Dakota CassidyLists comforted her - they gave her a sense of accomplishment - they meant she had control of something.
Dakota CassidyIf you close your eyes, no one can see you...
Dakota CassidyYeah, but that didn't mean he didn't like fistfuls of blondeness with legs longer than a Celine Dion note, now, did it?
Dakota CassidyAt that point, when she'd been staring down the account-whoring, turbo-bitch's face, she wouldn't have much cared if her head spun around and she'd yarked up pea soup at warp speed all over her. At least it would have matched Linda's new color ranking.
Dakota CassidyDo you promise to help me pack up my apartment and get all my stuff? I have a lot of stuff. A lot. Shoes and purses and clothes and nail polish. I have way more purses than you brought and at least a gatrillion dresses. I can't live without them-'
'I promise to haul your shit around.
This was like the Rubik's Cube of life.
One big glob of scattered, multicolored possibilities she had to sort out and line up in the appropriate manner by twisting endless scenario after scenario in her head.
And it sucked.
Big, fat wankers.
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