I’d hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that’s as good as you’re going to feel all day.

Dean Martin


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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Dean Martin


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The reason I drink is because when I'm sober I think I'm Eddie Fisher.

Dean Martin


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If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt.

Dean Martin

Tags: humour golf drunk-driving



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You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Dean Martin

Tags: drunkenness



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Не си пиян, ако можеш да лежиш на пода без да се държиш

Dean Martin


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I would rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy

Dean Martin

Tags: drinking spoonerism



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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're going to feel all day.

Dean Martin


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