I personally believe breathatarianism to be the highest mode of human living [...] breathing in pure air, absorbing the direct light and energies of the sun, bathing in pure water [...] I look at the obituaries every morning and ain't nobody listed but you eaters.
Dick GregoryIf they took all the drugs, nicotine, alcohol and caffeine
off the market for six days, they'd have to bring out the
tanks to control you.
Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
Dick GregoryThe only good thing about the good old days is they're gone.
Dick GregoryDear Momma―Wherever you are, if ever you hear the word "nigger" again, remember they are advertising my book.
Dick GregoryI never learned hate at home or shame. I had to go to school for that.
Dick GregoryNo kid in the world, no woman in the world should ever raise a hand against a no-good daddy. That's already been taken care of: A Man Who Destroys His Own Home Shall Inherit the Wind.
Dick GregoryTags: advice hope kids divorce womens-strength neglect abuse single-parenting broken-families
Momma, a welfare cheater. A criminal who couldn't stand to se her kids go hungry, or grow up in slumbs and end up mugging people in dar corners. I guess the system didn't want her to get off relief, the way it kept sending social workers around to be sure Momma wasn't trying to make things better.
Dick GregoryTags: economy political welfare struggles financial-hardships
Last time I was down South I walked into this restaurant, and this white waitress came up to me and said: 'We don't serve colored people here.' "I said: 'that's all right, I don't eat colored people. Bring me a whole fried chicken.
Dick GregoryTags: humor comedy civil-rights racism
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