Nothing says awkward like coming in your pants while dry humping.

Jay McLean

Tags: sex funny lol humping



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In my mind, this is what I look like: A giant St. Bernard, huffing and panting with sloppy drool falling out of my mouth, whimpering, like I need to lick and taste a giant bone inches from my face. He can be my giant bone. Oh. My. God. Bone.

Jay McLean


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I should lick him. Just his chest. NO! I’m not that wasted. Is he? Maybe he won’t remember if I just have one lick.

Jay McLean


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No one suspects the people they love of douchebaggery," Heidi looks at me sympathetically.

"Or slutbaggery," Lucy adds.

Jay McLean


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To whoever wrote Fifty Shades of Grey," Cam eyes the sky like he's thanking the Lord. We all laugh and drink.

Jay McLean


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I'm thinking that maybe I'm really far from more than a lot liking you, Mikayla Jones.

Jay McLean


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We're testing each other. Seeing how far we can take this before something snaps. Most likely my dick.

Jay McLean


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God Jake, I so much more than a lot like you."

"Mikayla, I passed that stage a long, long time ago.

Jay McLean


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And I look at him.
Really, truly, look at him.
And I fall in love all over again.

Jay McLean


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Because if I kiss you, then I'll want to taste you, and if I taste you then I'll need to fuck you. And if I fuck you, that means your mine. And when I make you mine, I want it to be in OUR bed. Not in a hotel room...Is that okay?

Jay McLean


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