I forced myself to stay put and keep looking - impatient assholes would make a leap, letting adrenaline and desperation guide them, but I was fucking ancient and I knew better. It was bitter, but I fucking knew better about just about everything.

Jeff Somers


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I forced myself to stay put and keep looking-impatient assholes would take the leap, letting adrenaline and desperation guide them, but I was fucking ancient and I knew better. It was bitter, but I fucking knew better about just about everything.

Jeff Somers


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I decided to irritate him, on the premise that it couldn't make my situation any worse.

Jeff Somers

Tags: humor-inspirational



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I didn't want to kill her; she was just doing her job. But she was standing between me and the rest of my miserable life, so she was going to have to take a bullet.

Jeff Somers


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