Just because she tried to eat us doesn't mean she was wrong

Jesse Petersen

Tags: humor

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So you killed him with what now?"

"I tried that Dr. Phil book at first"..."And I finished it off with the toilet seat. Just so you know, you left it up again. That drives me crazy.

Jesse Petersen

Tags: humor zombies

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I stared at him. "David, that's prison movies, not zombie movie.

Jesse Petersen

Tags: humor

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Thank God for the second amendment.

Jesse Petersen

Tags: humor

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Yeah.” Sven said. “The stuff she just said. Let’s not get all killy.

Jesse Petersen

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I went all kung fu on his zombie ass.

Jesse Petersen

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Fuck me, David! Dr. Kelly just tried to eat us!

Jesse Petersen

Tags: married-with-zombies

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I'd always thought the skinny little twerp was anorexic. But apparently what she needed wasn't a sandwich, as I'd often muttered as we left her office, but a manwich.

Jesse Petersen

Tags: married-with-zombies

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Put the small stuff into perspective. It's better to be wrong and alive than right but eating brains.

Jesse Petersen

Tags: married-with-zombies

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Balance the world in your relationship. No one person should be responsible for killing ALL the Zombies.

Jesse Petersen

Tags: married-with-zombies

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