Sometimes I wish I had a terrible childhood, so that at least I'd have an excuse.
Jimmy FallonDon't Keep reaching for the stars because you'll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no reason
Jimmy FallonTags: humor
We picked the Red Sox because they lose. If you root for something that loses for 86 years, you're a pretty good fan. You don't have to win everything to be a fan of something.
Jimmy FallonTroy: Why do we inflict this on ourselves?
Ben: Why? I'll tell you why, 'cause the Red Sox never let you down.
Troy: Huh?
Ben: That's right. I mean - why? Because they haven't won a World Series in a century or so? So what? They're here. Every April, they're here. At 1:05 or at 7:05, there is a game. And if it gets rained out, guess what? They make it up to you. Does anyone else in your life do that? The Red Sox don't get divorced. This is a real family. This is the family that's here for you.
Ben: You're gonna get arrested.
Lindsey Meeks: You can't sell your tickets!
Ben: That's why you ran across the whole field?... Wait, you've got to tell me - was it spongy?
Ben: You know what's really great about baseball?
Lindsey Meeks: Hmm?
Ben: You can't fake it. You know, anything else in life you don't have to be great in - business, music, art - I mean you can get lucky.
Lindsey Meeks: Really?
Ben: Yeah, you can fool everyone for awhile, you know? It's like - not - not baseball. You can either hit a curveball or you can't. That's the way it works...
Lindsey Meeks: Hmm.
Ben: You know?
Ben: You can have a lucky day, sure, but you can't have a lucky career. It's a little like math. It's orderly. Win or lose, it's fair. It all adds up. It's, like, not as confusing or as ambiguous as, uh...
Lindsey Meeks: Life?
Ben: Yeah. It's - it's safe.
Thank you 'adults who wear back packs' for letting me know that I don't have to take you seriously
Jimmy FallonThank you adult mittens, for allowing me to give people the finger without them knowing it.
Jimmy FallonTags: humor funny the-finger mittens
Thank you leaf blowers, for making me look like the world's lamest Ghostbuster. I ain't afraid of no leaves.
Jimmy FallonTags: humor funny fall leaves ghostbusters
Live your life by doing activities that are beneficial
Jimmy FallonPage 1 of 1.
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