If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
Lenny BruceTags: christianity execution catholicism jesus-christ anti-christian crucifixion anti-catholic death-penalty electric-chairs rosaries
If you can't say "Fuck" you can't say, "Fuck the government.
Lenny BruceTags: censorship fuck profanity government
The 'what should be' never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no 'what should be,' there is only what is.
Lenny BruceThe only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it...try to fake three laughs in an hour -- ha ha ha ha ha -- they'll take you away, man. You can't.
Lenny BruceSatire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
Lenny BruceTags: time satire tragedy comedy
There are never enough 'I love you's.
Lenny BruceTags: humor inspiration
Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.
Lenny BruceTags: god religion jesus organized-religion
Liberals can understand everything but people
who don't understand them.
You are a white. The Imperial Wizard. Now, if you don't think this is logic you can burn me on the fiery cross. This is the logic: You have the choice of spending fifteen years married to a woman, a black woman or a white woman. Fifteen years kissing and hugging and sleeping real close on hot nights. With a black, black woman or a white, white woman. The white woman is Kate Smith. And the black woman is Lena Horne. So you're not concerned with black or white anymore, are you? You are concerned with how cute or how pretty. Then let's really get basic and persecute ugly people!
Lenny Bruce…Catholicism is like Howard Johnson, and what they have are these franchises and they give all these people different franchises in the different countries but they have one government, and when you buy the Howard Johnson franchise you can apply it to the geography - whatever's cool for that area - and then you, you know, pay the bread to the main office.
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