I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

Roseanne Barr

Tags: housekeeping chores sears vacuuming vacuums



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The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.

Roseanne Barr

Tags: power women feminism



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Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.

Roseanne Barr

Tags: women menstruation pms



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Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles.

Roseanne Barr

Tags: men women travel maps penises directions overcompensation



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Women are cursed, and men are the proof.

Roseanne Barr


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To expect life to treat you good is foolish as hoping a bull won't hit you because you are a vegetarian.

Roseanne Barr

Tags: life vegetarianism justice fairness bulls



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Berharap hidup memperlakukanmu dengan baik karena kamu orang baik, itu sama konyolnya seperti berharap banteng takkan menandukmu karena kamu vegetarian

Roseanne Barr

Tags: humor life



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Excuse the mess, but we live here.

Roseanne Barr

Tags: life housekeeping cleaning mess messes



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As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job

Roseanne Barr


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This producer was a woman, a type I became acquainted with at the beginning of my stand-up career in Denver. I cared little for them: blondes in high heels who were so anxious to reach the professional level of the men they worshipped, fawned over, served, built up, and flattered that they would stab other women in the back. They are the ultimate weapon used by men against actual feminists who try to work in media, and they are never friends to other women, you can trust me on that.

Roseanne Barr


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