Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.

Scott Adams

Tags: humor life food

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The Cheesecake Factory is a great business model, but if you take your wife there for your 25th wedding anniversary, you might not reach your 26th.

Scott Adams

Tags: humor food marriage

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I love you like a fat kid loves cake!

Scott Adams

Tags: humor love food

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If I liked food and disliked exercise as much as a 400 pound guy, I'd be a 400 pound guy.

Scott Adams

Tags: food exercise

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Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Scott Adams

Tags: creativity

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If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?

Scott Adams

Tags: humor

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Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto

Scott Adams

Tags: humor philosophy

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Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there

Scott Adams

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Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.

Scott Adams

Tags: humor wisdom advice food fish

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I get mail; therefore I am.

Scott Adams

Tags: humor paraphrased

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