A brick could be used to destroy your mannequin lover. It’s the only proper thing to do. Remember, I was the one who warned you about dating a politician.


“The ultimate gift is the gift of life. Please, accept this jug of semen as a pr…”

“After I’m famous, I want my statue to be made out of beige Jell-O, and I want t…”

“Nothing is certain but death and taxidermy.”

“A blanket (twin, full, or queen-sized) could be placed squarely over the state …”