A half-truth is 90% of the story. The other 10% is tithed to God.

“When someone asks me if I was born in a barn, I always give them a long face. A…”

“I’d like to tweeze all the Tuesdays of the year, and all the Mondays off my che…”

“Vacation, I go there in my mind. Especially when I’m at work, getting paid for …”

“Pants don’t walk without legs in them. Let that be a lesson in love.”