An ice sculpture in the Sahara makes about as much sense as donkey left open gaping wagon, Sergeant (add cream cheese sparingly).

“I’ve got a flesh-colored tattoo. I drew it myself. You should see it sometime, …”

“I like to fantasize about how far I’ll have come in a year. A year from now, I’…”

“It’s hard to maintain dignity while wearing a coat made out of peacock feathers…”

“Maybe I could hear better if my ears weren’t flipped inside out. Unlike a cat’s…”