An ideal first date should involve things like a candle-lit dinner, soft music, and a binary anal defibrillator, with a guest appearance by Renaldo.

“I lit my loneliness on fire like it was a cigarette. But I didn’t smoke it, bec…”

“One word I’d use to describe space is lonely. The only way I’ll board a space s…”

“A brick could be used as man’s best friend, if you covered it in fur and taught…”

“A blanket could be used as a Portable Night Generator. Just stretch it over you…”