Before bed I do a bit of light reading. I’m reading a 50-pound book on midgets.

“A blanket and a brick could be put in a ring and paid to fight. Compared to MMA…”

“I think a cool band name would be War Dwarf. Of course, I’m entirely too tall a…”

“Dogs are exceptionally intelligent creatures. My dog, for example, taught me th…”

“My coffee cup didn’t come with a sleeve, but that’s OK, because I’m wearing a t…”