Chop off my erection. That way you don’t have to go battery-operated penis shopping.

“I tattooed my name on my buttocks, so you’d know what an ass I am. Also so eith…”

“I wrote something for my local newspaper, but nobody read it because it got bur…”

“Distributing unsolicited You’re Welcomes, it’s a thankless task. It’s almost as…”

“I went to Bath and Body Works this morning, because I really needed a shower. H…”