Dreams have one-way doors—the door you enter cannot be exited from, and the door you exit from cannot be used for reentry. And I just want to sell tickets to an event people will pay to sleep through.

“When my coffee is gone, so is my motivation.”

“Love is like war, except without all the blood and death and stuff.”

“I’m as thirsty as an elephant penis in the snow. I’m ready to love again.”

“I don’t collect awards, I collect empty trophy cases. Once my collection is lar…”