During the game, we find endless ways of saying that our team needs to score goals while at the same time not letting any in: ‘We need a goal here,’ ‘We don’t want to let one in now,’ and so on. (‘Here’ and ‘now’ are the words intended to indicate a keen understanding of the complex nature of the particular game, but in truth they mean nothing. Teams always need to score, and never want to let one in.)

Author: Nick Hornby