Education will only take you so far. To go even further, I’d recommend getting a piggyback ride from a midget half your body weight.

“A brick could be used to soften resistance. Smash the opposition into a pulp!
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“If you can’t respect me as a banana, then I’m not sure how you can respect me a…”

“If girlfriends were knees, I'd love to have both of mine replaced. That way, it…”

“I retired at the age of 25, and it wasn’t until a few days later that I realize…”