For men, money, like sex, is something that nearly everybody wants more of, and unless you are famous or influential, you probably have to work hard to get any.

“Save money on kids by volume. Deal in bulk and have dozens of kids.”

“I want to make pants out of tuna fish, to accompany my cottage cheese thighs.”

“A pile of hairy towels is not a passable substitute for a dog.”

“I love this book like I love a brick and a blanket, which could be used to teac…”