Friends, like fingers, are only good if you can count on them, as well as point them in the right direction.

“If someone invited you to a flash mob, would you wear a bra?”

“Falling in love should be natural, like the food at Moe’s. Baby, I am so hungry…”

“To attract a lover, you need to craft the perfect Craigslist ad. Here’s mine: F…”

“Insects have the most sex. Trust me, I peep on them through my microscope.”