Glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.

“Like a lot of people, I’ve always enjoyed commenting on strangers’ outfits. Unl…”

“Words have power, you dumb piece of shit.”

“I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought…”

“I am the Walrus, but not the one you're probably thinking of. I am the other Wa…”