I am a tree, though I’m not a shady character. I’m like a tree in winter.

“I’d love to be a color commentator, but I can’t, because I’m white, and white i…”

“You haven’t lived until you’ve wiped your ass with a pile of sand. Toilet paper…”

“A brick could be used as the ultimate bug crusher. But why you’d use a brick as…”

“My name is Don, as in sunrise.”