I am not into nudity on camera, but I would love to wear a banana peel over my penis and eat cat food from a little saucer while you snap off a few pictures of me.

“A rubber band is attached to a lever. Pull on the lever to increase the tension…”

“I have a responsibility as a human being to care for animals—including politici…”

“There’s a traffic jam in the stream. I’d better go fish up a solution. Too bad …”

“Cheyenne is shyin’ away from me. Why, Oming? I love you like a herd of buffalo …”