I am the William Wallace of love. Wait, no I’m not, I’m the Robert the Bruce.

“If I shake your hand, and then jack off, it’s as if you gave me an indirect han…”

“I have a deep respect for shallow pockets. They keep politicians honest.
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“I want to create a word that means “There’s probably a word for that,” but ther…”

“This leather chair belongs to me. I would let you sit in it, but you can’t sit …”