I didn’t want to go, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t want to be invited.

“A brick is what I’m voting for for President. And guess what? If you’re voting …”

“Love doesn’t have form (aside from your naked body), but it does have a shape. …”

“I ought to fire one of my two employees into the other one’s asshole.”

“In a blind taste-test, my kisses were rated as Helen Kelleresque. Women love ho…”