I don’t like chili, unless I’m wearing a jacket.

“I admire your mustache madam, but I wonder, what’s for dessert?”

“The best thing about dating a deaf woman with no nose is being able to fart in …”

“If a man’s a constant hand-shaker, he must be a politician or a crook—or both, …”

“The coast is clear. Not a beached whale in sight.”