I don’t need a coffee cup. That’s what hands were invented for. That’s also why I don’t need sex.

“A blanket could be used to make people smile. But the blanket won’t make just a…”

“A brick can and should be used as a telephone, because that way I won’t feel so…”

“I need to dig a hole the size of the Grand Canyon to bury all of my problems.”

“If love fell in love with another word, do you think that word would smell, tas…”