I feel like having another thigh and calf would give me a leg up on my competition.

“A figure 8 doesn’t figure into my plans to live to infinity.”

“If my nipples were restart buttons, I’d let you play with my buttocks.”

“It’s like Mark Twain once said to his wife, Olivia: “How many times do I have t…”

“John Nobody, a Nobody Inc. spokesperson, declined to comment. Or prove his exis…”