I feel self-conscious calling my cat fat in front of a fat person, considering I’m skinny and inconsiderate.

“I called the police to report my missing mustache, but they didn’t take me seri…”

“A blanket could be used to help my career. Things have gone cold in this econom…”

“-Do you have any scary I can borrow? Orafoura asked.
-I’m afraid not, I replied.”

“I want to merge oven mitts with boxing gloves, so I could effectively, and safe…”