I feel with a mullet and a mustache my job prospects would improve.

“Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aq…”

“All I have to say about love can be summed up in nine words: Never wipe your as…”

“I’m very proud of my body of work. You should see it naked sometime.”

“While I’m no Major League Baseball prospect, I have thrown a few no-hitters in …”