I gathered my courage like nuts and berries, I cautiously approached her, I waited for her to turn her head, and then I sprinkled them in her yogurt. Sometimes you just have to take a chance. Ah, but that’s life, no?

“If a woman says she got a bad haircut, and I agree with her, am I being agreeab…”

“I looked him right in his eyes and I said, “I don’t like you, Cyclops.” Then I …”

“My hand acts as a blanket for my genitals.
”

“I threw out my sausage, and replaced it with a healthier penis metaphor, like a…”