I gave blood today. It came gushing out of my nose. And anus.

“I yelled at my cat to knock it off, and sure enough, he did. And it broke.”

“It’s hard to wear a Speedo and pose with an erection. Still, I’ve got to try, e…”

“When I go to a restaurant and they say, “How many in your party?” and I say, “O…”

“This is my logo for Amy”