I got a new car. I just need to put it together. They’re easier to steal piece by piece.

“She had a smile like tomato sauce on Tuesdays, and she made my penis feel like …”

“I wanted “300” to be less about fighting, and more about bowling. At least they…”

“Her name is Coy. She’s shy, and I found her in my pond.”

“Farmers grow on the land. I suppose farmers grow farmers, rather than using sex…”