I got fat, and I decided to do something about it, so I got fatter.

“I often feel like a camel in the mountains, and a goat in the desert. Ah, but t…”

“Just because I flap my arms, that doesn’t make me a bird. No, I’m a bird becaus…”

“I once went toe to toe with an international thumb war champion.”

“If zombies eat brains, then they’d love me, because who doesn’t like a buffet?”