I heard you calling out to me, but I almost didn’t reply because you were using another guy’s name.

“My book is a light read. Seriously, it probably weighs 3.33 ounces. That’s pret…”

“I drove your lunch to work, and I parked it in my stomach.”

“On cloudy days I just want to raise my arm up, stand on my toes, and screw a li…”

“My mom gave me life, so I gave her batteries. AA batteries.”