I love body language, because I can speak it without talking, without listening, and while my back is turned.

“I once saw the world’s ugliest baby drown. But then I realized, “That’s not a b…”

“A good day is when the Oscar Meyer hotdogmobile crashes into a truck carrying H…”

“A windmill has arms, but does not hug. Where’s the love?”

“I asked myself a question, but I wouldn’t answer, because it was too personal. …”