I picked up the knife to cut the melon, and then smashed it with my fist instead.

“If I were a parent, I would feel like nudity should not be on the back of any m…”

“A blanket could be used to put the war in warm. Just paint the blanket like an …”

“The Nike swoosh logo would make an interesting mustache—on a man who runs his m…”

“Love is like a forest, I think as I kill trees by squandering toilet paper whil…”