I was eight when I moved to Florida, and I thought, “Oh great, the retirement capital of the world. I’ll be dead within a decade.

“Through the miracle of science, or divine intervention, a brick could be made s…”

“The two spoons were stuck together. Not because they were sticky, but because t…”

“It’s better to err on the side of more, than less, except if you’re talking abo…”

“I put tin foil on our relationship and stuck it in the fridge, because it neede…”