I was nine minutes late for my last birthday party. And I was nine months on time for my first birthday.

“I’m going to change the world, and all for under $14.95. I’m not going to chang…”

“It wouldn’t necessarily be tongue in cheek if a woman told me I kiss like a too…”

“The three of us met to discuss dinner over sandwiches, and I decided I liked th…”

“Love is a gift that costs nothing to give. Love is also the most valuable thing…”