I’d hang a walrus on my wall, and I’d name him Russ. But I’m not a hunter—I’m a lover and a fisherman. Dinner will be ready in ten minutes, if you want to take off your pants and wash up.

“If you’re wrestling someone underwater, don’t try to choke them, because it’s r…”

“How do you seduce a whole continent? One person at a time.”

“In 1,000 pages of Orafoura’s novel, I noticed he repeated one word twice. It re…”

“Divorce is the second worst event in a person’s life. The worst event, of cours…”