I’d hate to be forced to drink my own vomit without throwing up, because what if they made me drink that too?

“If you’re hungry, eat one of my new starvation pills. They taste like silence.
”

“The past—I’m looking forward to it.”

“I drink coffee like a civilized man—alone in a cave, wearing a loincloth, and g…”

“Dear Mr. Peacock,
I miss your plumage, and I’m flummoxed by your plummeting des…”