I’d rather fake my own fog, than fake a steamy love scene. Can I interest you in some mist? It’s homemade.

“I wonder if babies could be made more efficiently on a conveyer belt.”

“The way I wrestle five-year-olds makes me think if I were ever attacked by a pa…”

“A brick is like fruitcake. You don’t want to use it up all at once, and in fact…”

“Love is yesterday’s tomorrow, minus the frozen musical notes, soggy teabags, an…”