If I had four fingers growing out of my forehead, I wouldn't try to play the piano with my nose.

“The best place to hide gold coins is in a treasure chest filled with those circ…”

“Like a vibrator bolted on a bulldozer, I’m a regular sex machine.”

“Up until I saw the hair in my food, it was delicious. You know, cannibalism isn…”

“I wonder if babies could be made more efficiently on a conveyer belt.”