If I were a box of cereal, I wouldn’t want to talk about myself any more than I do now. Just flip me over and read all about me if you’re curious. Everything you need to know is printed right on my ass.

“Give people a little, and they’ll want a lot. Give them a lot, and they’ll only…”

“A one dollar bill, though it weighs less than 99 pennies, is psychologically he…”

“Do something productive, like painting or procrastinating or protesting—which i…”

“I like the name Lola, because it has LOL in the beginning.”