If it comes all scratched and dented, then no matter what you do, unless you buff and polish it, it always looks brand new. That’s why my love looks like it belongs in the trash. My love also looks like garbage so no thief will steal it away from you.

“When I meet a European, the first thing I say is, “I’d much rather watch footba…”

“I want to hire someone to stand outside my door and knock three times, with eac…”

“Cats are bundles of cute, wrapped in fur and purrs.”

“Cats are living, breathing blankets. But a blanket, no matter how furry, cannot…”