If it’s invisible, I can’t remember if it’s there or not. And not only that, but I can’t even remember what it is.

“I want my relationship with my girlfriend to be built on trust, not toothpicks,…”

“I’m different than other men in that I’m indifferent to the ins and outs of con…”

“When you’re as ugly as I am, you need all the beauty sleep you can get. I’ll be…”

“A door shaped like a vagina is more inviting. Sure, I’ll come in, but not slouc…”