If rubber bands played basketball, I’d tell them, You have to be better down the stretch.

“A Letter to Andre Breton, Originally Composed on a Leaf of Lettuce With an Ink-…”

“I think the best punishment for a misbehaving child is to strap them to a chair…”

“Personally, I’ve been here since 1982, and I’d say it’s about time for breakfas…”

“I want to end global hunger by feeding half the world’s starving people to the …”